A Hopeful Return (Life Updates)
May. 24th, 2026 11:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kotatsusHeya everyone.
It's kind of funny how I made the post "Future Plans For This Site & Others" and then just kind of. Disappeared off of my personal sites for a while, huh? I really wanted to continue coding and making the major update I had mentioned to kotatsu.me at that time, but I think a few things stopped me. 1.) I started working 3 days a week instead of 2, and 2.) the living environment at the time of writing that post wasn't the best, and exhausted me alongside the workload I had (tl;dr, our apartment faced an unsafe and loud back alley, to the point of sensory overwhelm and triggering PTSD symptoms at night). And now you may be thinking, "Proxy, 3 days a week isn't that much to work, how were you tired???"... to that, I say, I think it's because of health complications, alongside ADHD (and potential autism) lack of recharging time, and the constant overwhelm and triggers at night.
Originally, I had typed out this big long thing about the factors above, explaining them in a bit more detail than I really should online. The short of it is, I never felt fully rested between work and rest on that schedule. I never had the energy to do chores, let alone hobbies. It's as if my battery stagnated at 30% charged instead of max capacity between charges. Luckily, in fall of 2025, we were able to move out of that apartment, and into a quieter one.This, at least, helped get away from the unsafe and loud back alley our apartment had been facing, but did not make my rest any better. My doctor discovered that I had a Vitamin D deficiency, and put me on supplements. It helped a little, but not enough.
More recently I've had to reapply for therapy and am currently on a wait list. During this time, my psychiatrist gave me an assessment for autism, and is pretty sure I am autistic alongside my ADHD diagnosis. We're looking into ways to get it further assessed and recognized. With this news, I asked my boss to bring me back down to 2 days since the move out and supplements still weren't helping, and he was okay with it. I've been in the job a long time, and he noticed an uptick in me calling to say I'm running late, or even calling out. I'm glad to have such an understanding boss who also has ADHD.
All of this to say that I am now back down to 2 days a week instead of 3, and it's definitely already helping out a lot. I used all day yesterday to rest, and today I got a lot of chores done. Hell, the fact that I'm typing this up should say a lot in and of itself. Hopefully, it'll continue to feel this way, and I can get both chores and hobbies into my day to day life again without much exhaustion.
I hope you all keep an eye on my sites as I can hopefully work on them consistently again. I'll probably start with the move to Nekoweb & complete site rewrite. Wish me luck :)!
It's kind of funny how I made the post "Future Plans For This Site & Others" and then just kind of. Disappeared off of my personal sites for a while, huh? I really wanted to continue coding and making the major update I had mentioned to kotatsu.me at that time, but I think a few things stopped me. 1.) I started working 3 days a week instead of 2, and 2.) the living environment at the time of writing that post wasn't the best, and exhausted me alongside the workload I had (tl;dr, our apartment faced an unsafe and loud back alley, to the point of sensory overwhelm and triggering PTSD symptoms at night). And now you may be thinking, "Proxy, 3 days a week isn't that much to work, how were you tired???"... to that, I say, I think it's because of health complications, alongside ADHD (and potential autism) lack of recharging time, and the constant overwhelm and triggers at night.
Originally, I had typed out this big long thing about the factors above, explaining them in a bit more detail than I really should online. The short of it is, I never felt fully rested between work and rest on that schedule. I never had the energy to do chores, let alone hobbies. It's as if my battery stagnated at 30% charged instead of max capacity between charges. Luckily, in fall of 2025, we were able to move out of that apartment, and into a quieter one.This, at least, helped get away from the unsafe and loud back alley our apartment had been facing, but did not make my rest any better. My doctor discovered that I had a Vitamin D deficiency, and put me on supplements. It helped a little, but not enough.
More recently I've had to reapply for therapy and am currently on a wait list. During this time, my psychiatrist gave me an assessment for autism, and is pretty sure I am autistic alongside my ADHD diagnosis. We're looking into ways to get it further assessed and recognized. With this news, I asked my boss to bring me back down to 2 days since the move out and supplements still weren't helping, and he was okay with it. I've been in the job a long time, and he noticed an uptick in me calling to say I'm running late, or even calling out. I'm glad to have such an understanding boss who also has ADHD.
All of this to say that I am now back down to 2 days a week instead of 3, and it's definitely already helping out a lot. I used all day yesterday to rest, and today I got a lot of chores done. Hell, the fact that I'm typing this up should say a lot in and of itself. Hopefully, it'll continue to feel this way, and I can get both chores and hobbies into my day to day life again without much exhaustion.
I hope you all keep an eye on my sites as I can hopefully work on them consistently again. I'll probably start with the move to Nekoweb & complete site rewrite. Wish me luck :)!
